Monday, May 22, 2006

dwell

"Dwell in the midst of us....wipe all the tears from our faces....dwell in the midst of us...come and dwell in this place...dwell in the midst of us....come and have your way....not our will but yours be done, come and change us....not our will but yours be done, come sustain us...."

I love this song, probably my favorite from all my years in the Vineyard. The man who wrote it, Casey Cuorum, was the guest worship leader at our church on Sunday. He really knows what worship is and how to do it. I have not been at that level of worship in quite some time. I literally wept through the entire set. It was beautiful - as if you could just reach out and touch the hand of God. It was all that I had within me not to LEAP out of my seat and dance. I felt the presence of the Lord through my entire being, as if a warm glow had settled around me. I knew God was speaking to me, telling me that we were going to be alright, that He would guide our way.

I have struggled with a lot of confusion about the issue of church. Whether or not it was really even for us. I have felt disconnected and at a loss. I have had no peace in a long time.

You see, first and foremost, I am a servant. That is my heart. That is what I do best. It is all I want to do. I am not a "shout it from the rooftops" type of person. I am not very good at getting in people's faces about Christ and demanding that they turn or die. I want to show people the way of Christ in a practical, day-by-day approach. For me, that is to serve them, or serve in the church, whatever the case may be.

Secondly, I am a friend. I think I'm a pretty good one. I have learned a lot of lessons along the way and it has all helped me to be a better friend. The friendships that I have with the people I trust most are so important to me. I care deeply, and while that has gotten me into trouble at times, and I have been taken advantage of, I do not regret the opportunity to care for people. Sometimes people get so jaded about the world around them and think that people aren't worth the bother. For me, that is sad. What better way to reach someone, then just by loving them and serving them?

I am also a worshipper, a teacher and an administrator...but those are secondary to being the servant that God has called me to be!

I want God to come and dwell in me. So that all people see is God when they look at me. I don't need to be loud, outrageous or outspoken....that is not what I am called to be. Some people are. Some people are called to be like Paul - always had something to say. That's great....but it's not me. Now, I like to have an opinion, I just don't feel the need to cut people to the bone like I used to. Maybe I've mellowed in my old age.....maybe my husband's personality is rubbing off on me - GASP!

We attended a meeting for the new church plant after the service. it was great. We can really tell that this is where we belong. I told J that for the first time, I have peace. I know church plants are hard - my dad was a church planter. I know that there will be hard times ahead - but I welcome the challenge of doing something that will REALLY make a difference. The Amadeo Church will be one of those churches, I can feel it. I'm excited and ready to work!

My sis-in-law wrote a really interesting post regarding the body of Christ. You can click on the link that says "Chris Tipton," next to this post. Read it. It will really challenge your way of thinking - I guarantee it. Everyone is called to be something - what are YOU doing about what you are called to be? And God bless you if you know that you are right where you belong. I finally can say that I do - for the first time in a year. HALLELUJAH!!

1 comment:

Alyson said...

Peace. Isn't that the eternal human qwest? One day I have it, one day I've lost it. I am stoked to hear that you have it now. It is the most amazing feeling there is, I think. At least in the top ten! Love ya, sis.