truth

Telling the truth is hard isn't it? Sometimes it is just a matter of giving someone an answer to a question, but sometimes it can go much deeper. It can go into matters of the heart, how you're feeling, or just being realistic. I tend to tie the word truth in with the words honest and realistic. Everyone has their "truth" and sometimes that differs with someone else's "truth", even in the same situation. I am facing three areas in my life that are requiring some form of truth right now. Just trying to get my thoughts in order, so bear with me.......

HEALTH
I am going to the doctor on Wednesday. I have really been struggling with some health issues lately, and it's causing me a lot of pain/discomfort. So, I have made an appointment and I hope to have some answers by the end of it all. I really do not like to go to the doctor, as you all know. But, to tell the truth, I am so miserable I guess desperation has set in. I don't really want to go into it here, as it's personal. If you have a great need to know, just give me a call or email me. To be honest, I am terrified of the answer I may get. I know realistically that it's probably an easy fix, but I'm a glass half empty type of gal..... I am also having heart palpatations again and my migraines are getting worse. I don't know what to do, but I'm just going to lay it all out there for the doctor and see what happens.

HOME
We are still looking at houses. We put an offer in on two this weekend. The first was already sold, and the second we are countering back and forth. I have to say that this is quite stressful for me, and I almost hope the deal just falls through so that I don't have to worry about it any more. I have a crazy week in store for me, with three birthdays and a weekend of parties. So, I really don't need any more stress! I just really want to be in my own home, to settle in and not worry about this kids eating in the living room! To be able to paint and decorate and not live in a sterile white house! YUCK!

HAPPINESS
This is the hardest truth for me to deal with right now. Why does being happy take so much effort? I really thought that once I moved to Phoenix and settled in, I would be happy. But now, Matt and Chris are moving, my parents are discouraged and depressed about church and life in general, and its been a real struggle trying to fit in at church. Don't get me wrong, I'm still happy to be here, but these things are just wearing me down. I know that happiness is a choice, and I have really been trying to just be happy with what I have. But, I have to say that it's getting harder to paste a smile on my face! There are other things in my life that are challenging my happpiness right now, but I'm not at liberty to share.

The truth? Life is tough right now, now just for me, but for everyone. So, don't freak out and think I'm going to jump off the nearest building (Jenell). I just needed to vent a little and to let you all know what's really going on. That's the whole point of this blogging thing....right???????