A new member....

Here he is! Charlie Johnson is the newest addition to our family. We will be picking him up on the 15th. He will be neutered, litterbox trained and have all his shots by then. Isn't he the cutest thing? He is the runt of the litter...very fitting for our family, I think! HA!

SIGH....

It's March 9th and I have the air conditioner on tonight. It's 83 in my house at 9:30 pm.......here we go!

Taa Daa!!

Here it is - the new house! Closed yesterday afternoon and have already moved some pictures in today! I have a feeling that I'm going to want to be in WAY sooner than J! HA! We're going to paint this week/weekend and I'll post more pics when that is done!
Enjoy!

The kitchen:


The cool sink in the kitchen (my personal favorite):


The Master Bath:

Freedom

This has been an interesting season for me. I have really enjoyed Christmas and all that the holiday offers. It has been fun to give and to receive. I have loved seeing my children understand the difference between Santa and Jesus.
I received a new gift this year - freedom. The freedom not to care if I gained 5 lbs. over the holidays....freedom to say goodbye to the past and the hurts that lie there....freedom to embrace the future and actually look forward instead of backward.
Here's what started me on this journey....myspace. I know...I know....not a likely place to gain freedom. However, it was through this media that I was faced with memories from the past and felt the need to deal with it once and for all. I'm not going to bore you with all the details, but sufficed to say that I argued with God and He won. He had me contact someone that I didn't want to , had no intention of every speaking with again really. But, I did it and I have to say that it felt good. The response was not overwhelming - really quite underwhelming, but for once it didn't matter. I felt the need to release that poison from my soul and I did. I can't say that I will ever be a part of this person's life, but now I don't have to cringe whenever I'm faced with the prospect of seeing them.
I have a long ways to go before I'm completely free, but I feel like I've taken a major step forward. Happy New Year!

Tamale party

Here are Cais and I at Amadeo's Tamale Party on Saturday. We had a great time of fellowship and eating some AWESOME mexican food. Homemade Tamales (which I helped make, by the way), rice, beans and salsa. My tummy is growling just thinking about it! (I have to laugh cause when I typed "growling" I first typed "growing" - I guess you could say that too! HA!)
This is going to be an annual event. Much fun was had by all - including the kids!

In other news....my bruise is healing, so my bum doesn't hurt as much - although there is still a huge knot....house is coming along nicely - there is now carpet and sinks and toilets in....looking forward to next Monday - CHRISTMAS! My favorite day of the year!

Love to all!

An embarrassing predicament....

So, I was headed down the stairs Saturday night when I literally "headed" down the stairs. My foot slipped on the top step and I flew up in the air and down six stairs right on my bum! OUCH!
I was so embarrassed! I cried and that made the kids come out of their rooms.....good grief! Man oh man was I (and still am) ever sore. Sunday morning I could barely move! I'm sure people at church thought I was walking weird and VERY slow.
The most embarrassing thing is that for two days I could not sit down comfortably! Sunday, I couldn't sit down for more than two minutes at a time...I was pacing in the back of church.....maybe Ben thought I was interceeding or something....HA! Today is the first day I'm able to sit without wincing or wanting to throw up.
AND THE BRUISE! Oh man, you should see the bruise. J took a picture, but it was a little too personal to post on my blog, if you know what I mean! HA! You all know that I bruise really easily and this is the WORST bruise I have ever had! It was a huge knot in it and is currently dark purple......
So, I've given you all your laugh for the day! Enjoy it! HA!

House

Here are some pics of the new house. I took them this weekend! Enjoy!

the good, the bad, and the ugly

So, we had a nice Thanksgiving and all that. Never been a big fan of turkey and stuffing, so it was just another meal to me. I AM looking forward to Christmas where we are going to have a big Mexican fiesta on Christmas day! THAT is something to look forward to!
Anywhoo....this week has been quite interesting, so I thought I'd share a few observations with you on the week that was November 22-29, 2006:

The good:
Had fun with family for Thanksgiving....got to read a HILARIOUS story about Chris' Thanksgiving on her myspace page (25 lb. turkey with an attitude! HA!).....had a nice weekend just relaxing with my family.....got to go shopping....made a gingerbread house....put up Christmas decorations and did the tree with the kids.....it was so great to see Aaron and Christina on Thanksgiving and spend some time with them.... I am going to start getting paid by the church, so HALLELUJAH! Hopefully, I won't have to look for another job as well - keep up your prayers!

The bad:
Wil woke up at 2:30 am Thanksgiving morning and threw his guts up all day.....took my car back to the shop for the 5th time and it STILL isn't fixed right......Sam was sent home for the third time in as many weeks for throwing up....found out that I won't be able to go to Florida in Feb.....just too busy - so next year for sure!

The ugly:
Black Friday - oh my goodness...oh my goodness....what is up with the insane people getting up at 4 am to stand in line in front of a store for 2 hrs., only to have everything gone 5 min. after the store opens? Do not ever ask me to do that again....it was not fun....it was actually sad to see the greed come out in people....a little disconcerting to say the least.....I got yelled at by a lady and you know that really doesn't work well for me.....all in all not a "good time"......

Anyway, that was a brief snapshot of the week. If you haven't been watching "Heroes" or "Friday Night Lights", you don't know what you're missing! Man, it's nice to actually watch some well written shows for once! If you get a chance, check them out!

joy and giving thanks...

Happy Thanksgiving to you all! We are excited to be staying in Phoenix this year for the holiday season. NO TRAVELING! Hooray! But, I hope for all of you who are, that you will be safe and enjoy the time with family and friends.

I attended the Women of Faith conference this past weekend with my mom and cousin, Lesha. We had a great time and really enjoyed the conference as a whole. There was one speaker that really stood out to me, maybe because we have similar backgrounds, or maybe because she just spoke something that really hit me where I live. Her name was Luci Swindoll (sister of Chuck) and she talked about how we should celebrate life and find the pockets of joy in everyday - even the bad ones! I can't remember everything she said, but the theme of her talk really convicted me.

As most of you know, I am a pretty pessimistic person - definitely a glass half empty type of gal if you know what I mean. I have a hard time seeing the good in the bad. I realized this weekend that it has been a long time since I had a good belly laugh. It is much easier to see the bad stuff going on, focus on that and forget that there is always joy to be found. So, in order to get myself headed in a different direction, I am going to list 5 things that bring me joy:

1. My husband. We have a very difficult year thus far. With the closing of our business, almost filing bankruptcy, and some personal issues....we have been skating on some pretty thin marital ice. However, J brings me so much joy! He is always trying to find ways to make me smile. He sometimes goes to the extreme of nuttiness in order to do so, but he can always wring a smile or laugh out of me. I choose to love him every day for the rest of my life. He is my joy.
2. My kids. While they may drive me crazy, they do things every day that bring me so much joy. From snuggling up to me on the couch to helping out with house cleaning - they always want to see me happy. I want to enjoy this time in their lives. I choose to focus on the "pockets of joy" vs. the bad moments. They are my joy.
3. My parents. I have so enjoyed the last year and a half of living near them. They are such special people and I am so glad that they are my parents. I choose to enjoy the good times and not focus on the sad ones. They are my joy.
4. My new house. I can't wait to move in! I am looking forward to clean carpet and the freshness that a new house brings. I choose to focus on the excitement of moving in and not the anxiety of mortgage payments or the possibility of finding a job. Finally moving into a house that is 'ours" will bring me joy!
5. My church. Finally, a place where we feel a sense of belonging! We have been so welcomed by all these people in Amadeo. We are moving to Sundays in a couple weeks and I feel a certain anticipation in that. I feel that God is telling us to get ready! I choose to walk in that anticipation! These people and this church bring me joy.

There! That wasn't too bad! I want to choose to walk in faith that God will continue to bring me reminders to look for the pockets of joy in my life. Life...celebrate it....live...laugh...learn...love. (Luci Swindoll). May God begin to show you the small things to be thankful for during this time. I am so thankful for all of you!

grumble...grumble....grumble....

It's so annoying how just when you think you're getting on top of things, something comes along to knock you back down.
Sunday morning, J went out to do the paper route around 1:30 am and found that someone had smashed the passenger side window in his truck. So, he brushed the glass aside and did his route. As we were leaving later that morning to take pictures, he discovered that someone has done the same thing to MY passenger side window on the CR-V. ARGH! So, we spent the rest of the day calling the police and insurance companies and cleaning out the glass in both of our cars. Luckily, I have glass coverage on my car, so it's covered. I'm actually waiting for the glass company to come fix it now. Unfortunately, J does NOT have the same coverage so it's going to cost us $180 to fix his window. How irritating is that? Some stupid person decides to get their jollies off of breaking our windows and WE have to pay for it??????? Grumble....grumble...grumble....

I guess I should be happy that no one was hurt and that nothing was stolen from inside the cars. J had cash in his truck and that wasn't gone. It just makes me so mad that people do this - what is up with that?

In better news - the financing on the house is going through fine. The payments are about what we thought they would be, so that's a relief. There is one loan that our mortgage guy is trying to get for us. It would be so great, but we have a 50/50 chance of getting it. So PRAY that it comes though. We went to the design center last week and picked out our carpet/tile and appliances. That was really fun. The house is moving right along. It's painted and the countertops are in. We go by about once a week to see the progress. The kids are enjoying that.

We had a fun Halloween, although we've decided that going to a church carnival might be the better way to go next year. We have so much candy - not good for someone who really shouldn't have any chocolate at all! It's going to find a special hiding place today. Probably in the bottom of my freezer! HA!

That's about it for now! We are moving right along! Looking forward to going to the zoo with Cais on Thursday for a field trip. The kids have Friday off of school, so we're going to hang out with my friend Jessica and her boys at the park. No soccer this week and next weekend is the last weekend! HOORAY! Looking forward to having a break from that. Sam is going to play next season (Jan-Mar), but Cais has decided to try something else....gymnastics perhaps?

We miss and love you all!

Happy Halloween

Here are my cute kiddos from Halloween. We had fun - just went trick or treating in our neighborhood and my parent's. Cais was a princess, Sam was a Ninja Turtle and Wil was Swiper the Fox from Dora.

one year later...

I just realized that it's been just a little over a year since I started this blogging process. It's funny when you go back and look at a year's worth of writing and see how much you've changed and how differently you view the world around you.
For me, I realize that I have a much more realistic view of life than ever before. There have been several things happen in the last year to make me realize that life is definetly what you choose to make it. You can either decide to lay down and die, or pick yourself up, dust off and move forward.

Choice is a difficult thing. When I was a kid, I couldn't wait to be able to make my own choices and do my own thing. Little did I realize that those years were the golden moments of life. Choices were made for you - no deciding where money was coming from and to whom it was going to. You lived life freely - no constraints of time, money, cell phones, children, mortgages, etc... What a life!

As an adult, hindsight is 20/20. I long for the days of childhood. Somedays I would like to just ride my bike outside for hours - without the pain on my knees! HA! But I do see that being able to make my own choices is one of the greatest teaching tools I have ever had in my life. I don't regret my choices, because I have either learned something from the results, or they have shaped my into who I am today.

I have recently been challenged with a choice in my personal life. It has pushed me to the brink of who I am and what I believe about life and loving others in general. Never before have I had to dig so deeply into myself and press into God as I have in this situation. But through this challenege I have come into a new awareness of what choice really is. It is obedience. It is sacrifice. It is giving up control of what YOU want and viewing the situation through God's eyes. Agape love...look it up...live it for a week....my challenge to you....

In other news....we are moving right along! We qualified for the house and now we have to figure out how to pay for it! HA! Pray for us as we seek God's will in this. Going back to work is looking like the only option, so pray that God will provide the right job with the right schedule for me. Will probably start looking after Christmas.
We are getting ready for Halloween on Tuesday. I'll post pics then - should be cute!
Hope all is well where you are. I'm so looking forward to the holidays - my favorite time of year. Remember....Phoenix is beautiful in the winter....come visit!

TV Observations

Grey's Anatomy - Meredith should definitely be on drugs more often! That was hilarious. Although I was disappointed she ended up picking Derek, the drug scenes were worth it. 8 million for Izzy? Who knew Denny was so loaded?

ER - If you did not watch this last night, you missed out on one of the funniest scenes I've seen in awhile. The Mommy and Me class fiasco was so funny - I could totally identify....I have one of those Snuggli baby holders and have encountered the same stupidity in regards to it.....made me glad I never went to one of those classes......Abby's comeback was priceless!

Anyway, just a couple observations from someone who was FINALLY at home for an evening!

Vindication?

I heard on the radio today that in a study of over 5500 kids that breastfed kids are no smarter than formula fed....HA! Vindication?!?!?!?
Sorry - I just had to include that......

Anyway, here is a quick update.
We are doing fine. The church is so wonderful - Ben has been challenging and stretching J and I to think beyond our small circle and so we have been trying to reach out to others in our neighborhood/school/soccer games, etc... Really trying to love others with God's love...which means EVERYONE, no matter how needy or weird or irritating they are! HARD!!!! We are really starting to feel a part of something amazing. Everyone has been so welcoming and encouraging. It so reminds me of what we had in Heber....
Kids are great. This picture is from Crazy Hair day...Sam had a mohawk (which you can't see real well) and Cais had pigtails all over her head. It's Spirit Week at Destiny, so they are having fun. A whole week with no uniforms! They are looking forward to Halloween and Fall Break (next week). Wil is doing great too. He so wants to be in school like his brother and sister. So, I think I'm going to try and get him into the Gilbert Park and Rec. program like I did with Sam.
J's job is going well. He has won a couple of bids, so that is encouraging. He has worked so hard, it's nice to see it pay off finally. He is really getting involved in church, with men's group and helping with set-up/tear down.
I'm doing good as well. Doing a little work for Amadeo as well as helping with the women's Bible study. My mom started working a couple days a week, so I have been using those days to get all my housework done. BSF is great - we are studying the book of Romans this year and it has been really interesting. I'm so busy, I can't sit down for two minutes!
We are still looking for a house. We really would like to live in the neighborhood where we have church. Please pray that God would lead us to where HE wants us to be. We want to be effective witnesses in our neighborhood! Luckily, we have a couple months before we have to make any decisions.
Anywhoo....that was a longer update that I expected! Hope all is well with all of you!

welcome baby cloud

Congrats to Ben and Mandy on the birth of Grayson Bono Cloud. Born yesterday at 7:25 pm - weighing in at 8 lbs. 10 ozs. and 21 inches long. Heard he's cute and chubby! Hooray for a healthy birth!

happy birthday j

Monday was J's 30th birthday. We went to Buca di Beppo on Saturday for his party. We had a great time. His mom, Betty was here and our friends Ben and Mandy and J's boss Marty came along with my parents and Aaron and Christina. I think he was pleasantly surprised by everyone and was very blessed. Here are some pics of our time together:

The kids


Mom and Dad


Aaron and Christina


Ben and Mandy

misunderstood

I guess I need to clarify what I said in my previous post. I was pretty steamed when I read the article, so a lot of that was venting.
No, I am not mad at breastfeeding moms. I think that if you can do that - great!
No, I do not feel that any of you have made me feel bad for bottle feeding...for goodness sake, Jenell practically drove to my apartment herself to give Cais a bottle!
I am not ashamed of having to bottle feed by kids. Like I said, I'm just really tired of making excuses for doing so.
I AM tired of reading article after article making breastfeeding sound like if you don't do it, you are a bad mom or your kids will be "less than". Disagree if you want, but it's the truth. EVERY mom I have ever met who bottle feeds will tell you the same thing.
Geez people.....don't you know me at all?????

rant

OK - I have to say that if I hear one more thing about how breastfed babies are smarter, prettier, nicer, don't get sick/ear infections, more apt to go to college, more likely to win a Nobel Peace Prize, etc...I am going to puke!
The newest insult stems from an article I read in my Parents magazine today. NOW, not only are breastfed babies all of the above and so much more, NOW they don't wet the bed as much as their formula fed counterparts. ARGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I have tried to be nice about this, but I am taking the gloves off. JUST BECAUSE YOU BREASTFEED YOUR BABY...DOES NOT MEAN THAT YOU ARE PERFECT AND NEITHER IS YOUR CHILD!
Believe me, I have seen lots of breastfed babies and I like the fact that my kids were formula fed. My kids have had their share of problems, but NONE of my three kids had any issue potty training! And, they had formula every day until they were a year old! I got to sleep and my husband got to take a turn at 2 in morning! I am DONE making excuses about why I didn't breastfeed! Maybe it was - gasp - because it's a complete pain it the butt and more trouble than it's worth??!!?!?! Everyone else gets to have an opinion, but mine doesn't count - PLEASE!!!
Every kid does stuff at their own pace and in their own timing. WHO CARES!!!!!!!!! Why does everything have to be a competition? And this is from someone who is very competitive! Good grief, don't we have bigger problems in our world to deal with? No, we have to give out "grant" money for the sake of studying breastfeeding and potty training?!?!?!?! In the words of one of my favorite reporters, John Stossel,- GIVE ME A BREAK!

soccer stars

Here are a couple pics of my "soccer stars" in action this weekend. Cais won her game (2-0) and ALMOST scored. Sam's team lost (5-3), but he got to play goalie for the first time ever and as you can see, he loved it! He blocked three shots and only got scored on once! He is the youngest player on the team and can play with the best of them. I was really proud of both of them. One of the boys on Cais' team has a crush on her (his mom told me). That was a little weird to hear! I don't know that J and I are quite ready for that! HA!
Anyway, enjoy the pics! I'll post more towards the middle of the week.

here's to you Jenell

I ate at Golden Corral tonight.....enough said.......